Duality

You know that moment, the one where everything suddenly falls into place? The one where everything is suddenly illuminated in front of you, and the surrounding fog has vanished? When you spend weeks, months, even years attempting to discern all you can, and you feel you have it, but only loosely? Then in a split second the jigsaw pieces fit.

I like that feeling.

The thing is, this feeling cannot last long, because to know is to understand what you do not know. And it is only in absolute comprehension that you realize what you have is just another piece in an even larger puzzle.

I like that feeling too.

It is both intimidating and invigorating to become aware of the vastness in front of you, even if you can only grasp at this knowledge for an instant before it recedes away. Recognition of ignorance dispels ignorance.

Socrates once said, "The only real wisdom is knowing you know nothing." Wisdom comes from that tiny split-second when it all makes sense, and suddenly you are able to look out from your plateau, and all you see is a great plain stretching out in all directions with no end in sight. It simultaneously makes your heart pound and drop out of your chest. You breathe fast, and not at all. You go numb, and feel everything at once. Your vision blurs, and you have never seen more clearly. It is in that open vastness that you see the unconquerable, the forever free, that which can never be obtained. And in this moment nirvana is reached; waves of calm wash upon the beaches that harbor your fears, you trepidations, your thoughts. You know all and you know none.

As quickly as the moment comes, it is gone, and you are back.